New Barack Obama is Boring

What happened to Obama the celebrity? Because Obama the politician is boooorrrriiinngg. He needs to stay on message. Meaning, talk about change, not about what change is. The devil truly is in the details. Make me believe you'll make things better. Don't tell me how. Another $1000 in stimulus? Please! If a thousand dollars could change my life, I'd make a deposit at the sperm bank. And Wall Street regulation? Snooze! Crack down on lobbyists? I don't actually think the average American can tell me what a lobbyist is. And as a private detective/c-list blogger who does know what a lobbyist is, I really don't think a crack down will effect the way I live. I really prefer Obama acting all schticky and cutesy like he did on Letterman.

Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton on SNL...sorta

Watch Tina Fey and Amy Poehler as Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton on last night's season premier of Saturday Night Live. The two women address sexism in the campaigns. Its hilarious...check it:

Viral Video Of The Week

This is the latest Microsoft Bill Gates/Jerry Seinfeld "commercial" but it's really more of a short film. It's four and half minutes long and is totally hilarious. Bill and Jerry are feeling out of touch with reality, so they go stay with a normal middle-American family. And hilarity ensues.

Sarah Palin On God And War With Charlie Gibson

Well, at least she backpedals like a real politician.

A brief transcript from the interview:

GIBSON: You said recently in your old church, “Our national leaders are sending U.S. soldiers on a task that is from God.”

[PALIN speaking in an archive clip]: Pray for our military men and women who are striving to do what is right, also for this country, that our leaders, our national leaders are sending them out on a task that is from God.

GIBSON: Are we fighting a Holy War?

PALIN: That’s a repeat of Abraham Lincoln’s words, when he said, first he suggested, never presume to know what God’s will is, and I would never presume to know God’s will or to speak god’s words, but what Abraham Lincoln had said, and that’s a repeat in my comments, was, let us not pray that God is on our side, in a war, or any other time. But let us pray that we are on God’s side. That’s what that comment was all about, Charlie.

Obviously, what Palin says at that speech bears no resemblance to her own explanation given in last night's interview. I've done a little Googling and there's no possible way anyone in their right mind could construe Palin's words as some sort of re-imagining of Abraham Lincoln's words. Now, Lincoln clearly spent a lot of time speaking of god. But, within the context of invoking god as justification for policy, it seems Lincoln was implying the complete opposite of what Sarah Palin said in her speech.

Abraham Lincoln's quote from wikiquote: "Our task should not be to invoke religion and the name of God by claiming God's blessing and endorsement for all our national policies and practices—saying, in effect, that God is on our side. Rather, we should pray and worry earnestly whether we are on God's side."

Attack Ads: McCain Hits Hard With Lipstick and Fact Check

I gotta admit, Obama is sounding desperate in his off-the-cuff speech. It's like he's willing to say anything. It's vaguely reminiscent of the flustered Hillary Clinton that emerged. The Obama people gotta figure out a better way to manage this whole Palin thing. The Karl Rove handbook says go after her strengths. I can see how it's difficult when her greatest strength is that she's a she.

Sarah Palin Wins Vagina Vote

Hot off the presses from Reuters:

"Before the Democratic National Convention in late August, Obama held an 8 percentage point lead among white women voters, 50 percent to 42 percent, but after the Republican convention in early September, McCain was ahead by 12 points among white women, 53 percent to 41 percent, the poll found."

This point swing is something we haven't seen in a very long time. Back in the university days, we used to call a swing like this "statistically significant." How refreshing. Is Samantha Bee right? Are women abandoning that whole pro-choice thing to get a woman into the White House? Just like that, huh? If Democratic women believed in god, I'd say they just sold their soul for vagina. Now of course I sell my soul for vagina every friday and saturday night at bars and clubs, but I sorta expected more from the fairer sex.

John McCain Is NOT A Maverick

Latest attack ad from Barack Obama. "John McCain is more of the same." I didn't get a chance to talk about McCain's RNC speech, but in case anyone cares, I actually thought it was pretty good. Not that I know anything at all about campaign strategy, but it seemed to hit the notes it was supposed to hit and it struck me as sincere. Surprised?

John McCain Wants Ron Paul Support, I Laugh

The Washington Times is reporting that John McCain has his sights set on Ron Paul and his supporters. This is totally hilarious because John McCain is a socialist. "Mr. Paul has refused to endorse Mr. McCain, and Mr. McCain's operatives have refused to let him address the Republican National Convention. " In fact, it seems that the McCain people are playing hard ball by restricting his camp's access to the convention. Says statesman.com,

Paul spokesman Jesse Benton said later that Paul can go to the floor like any Republican House member. But, Benton said, the party has yet to agree to permit Paul to be accompanied by a political aide and someone to keep watch over him.

“We thought we had an agreement over the weekend” enabling Paul to circulate with two aides on the floor among some 260 delegates in his camp. “It looks like there is a hang-up.”

All very interesting stuff. These people really know how to win over your support. I'm sure after being treated like Ralph Nader, Ron Paul is dying to hand over his donor list.

And here's Ron Paul at the Rally For The Republic: