YouChoose Roundup

• John Edwards: Stop trying to make HAIR happen.
• Dennis Kucinich: I like you, but why would you remind us that you're friggin 90? BTW, I like that you still wear that suit.
  
• Barack Obama: Hip-Hop still scares voting-age white folk. Just sayin.
• John McCain: Oh wait, nevermind. I forgot that we don't talk about you anymore.
• Joe Biden: If you're gonna do David Letterman, go for the LOLs! But good job.
• Rudy Giuliani: Congratulations. You sold out a coffeehouse. PS, can someone please tell me a) where South Carolina is and b) is that where DELIVERANCE took place?
• Mike Huckabee: Contrary to popular belief, some us are, in fact, descended from monkeys. Why is that so bad?
  

YouChoose 08' Stats of the Week

In looking at the latest YouChoose stats, we can plainly see that Barrack Obama leads the pack with a robust 11 Million channel views - a full 8.6 Million more than the next closest candidate. We still don't know how this will translate to votes, but in the meantime in an environment where buzz and press make all the difference in the world, we have to assume that the interest online will have some impact and/or correlation with outcome. The latest YouChoose stats are as follows:

Barrack Obama has 11 Million channel views and 9,400 subscribers
Ron Paul has 2.4 Million channel views and 22,000 subscribers

Hillary Clinton has 770,000 channel views and 4,900 subscribers
Mitt Romney has 690,000 channel views and 2,600 subscribers

John Edwards has 590,000 channel views and 3,500 subscribers
Rudy Giuliani has 585,000 channel views and 2,000 subscribers

Bill Richardson has 520,000 channel views and 1,300 subscribers
John McCain has 450,000 channel views and 1,400 subscribers

Joe Biden has 260,000 channel views and 1,000 subscribers
Mike Gravel has 200,000 channel views and 1,900 subscribers

YouChoose Roundup

• Ron Paul is still a genius, his supporters are still fucking CRAZY.
• Mike Gravel has sexy elbows.
• Hillary equals change. Change equals Hillary. Therefore, Bill Clinton looks like Bob Barker.
• Barack: T-Mobile called. They want Barkley back. Seriously dude.
• To All Conservatives: What did ever happen to that whole government,-keep-out thing? (See Ron Paul.)
• John Edwards: Bye.
  

Okay. I'm done. And bored. Time to drink.

YouChoose Roundup

I liked writing the YouChoose Roundup last week. I think I'll stick with it. Every Wednesday. Same time. Same channel.

1. I Like Mike? Really? Sounds familiar... Oh wait. I get it. That's witty. Wait. Nope. It's lame.
2. Dennis Kucinich: 1974 called. They want their suit back. Not even the "every man" would be caught dead in that.
3. spittingame: If you want Sam Brownback to respond, you're gonna have to do the Numa Dance.
4. Jamie: Less politics more bootie dance plz! You're such a cutie! Send full-body-pic? LOLS!
5. Anyone else notice that John Edwards becoming Anne Coulter's campaign manager completely evaded the news?
6. Hillary Clinton and Ellen DeGeneres are a match made in heaven. I'm just sayin...
7. Barack Obama: Excellent use of white folk.
8. Stop trying to make Al Gore happen. It's not going to happen!
9. Rudy Giuliani: I don't care what Pat Robertson says. Conservatives (and Jesus) know you love the gays.
10. Sometimes you gotta pass on the politics for a little Phil Collins.

YouChoose Roundup

It's been a little while since I've gone into any depth on YouTube's YouChoose '08, so I'll cover some bullet points:

1. I'm not covering Sam Brownback's time in the YouChoose Spotlight. Why? Because I don't think anyone will give a shit if don't.
2. It's a little surprising that Barack Obama didn't get a bigger pop in Channel subscriptions off of his Spotlight video. It's becoming obvious that the fanaticism is over and we've been over saturated. He still trails light-years behind Ron Paul, who continues to grow stronger.
3. Why on earth didn't Hillary Clinton's people post her Soprano's spoof video to YouTube? Now, a handful of schmucks have uploaded it and are getting all the hits. With that mentality, they might as well hand the White House over to Fred Thompson on a silver platter.
   
4. BTW, I really like Carl Bernstein's notion that Hillary and Bill would be co-presidents. If that was her platform, she would be unstoppable.
5. I like Mike Gravel. He reminds me of my Grandpa. He sits you down and tells you a thing or two about the world.
6. Is it bad to crack jokes about Maya Angelou? Like, is that just crossing line? Okay, I'll refrain.
7. Dennis Kucinich: More hot wife please. You're starting to lose us.
8. Tom Tancredo: Less walks down memory lane, more securing our borders please. I don't care where you went to elementary school.
9. John McCain: Thanks! I'm actually dumber from watching your last video. It's good to know that if you were president my taxes would go to NASCAR stadiums (nascar is in stadiums, right?)